Geeks Demand Equal Time Under Fairness Doctrine
Cute Geeky Guys
Ever since I published Are Emo Guys the Antidote to Frat Poison? last week, I’ve been getting some pushback from geeky types and the girls who love them. Hey, I’m game. I love geeks. In fact I married one, sort of. Well…he had been a geek, for sure, but I met him when he was 26, and by then he had morphed into a really cool, smart guy. Looking at his high school pics, though….um, no. Just no.
But here’s the thing: geeks are often ugly ducklings. In high school, they always seem to be short and skinny and wear braces through junior year. They’re always pasty white from hanging out in the lab instead of playing sports in the sunshine. Fast forward ten years. Now they’re gazillionaires from their techy start-ups. Or they’re on Wall St. (when it still existed), or the partner track at a law or consulting firm. They are interesting writers, and filmmakers, and well, you get the picture.
Meanwhile, the star quarterback from your high school is bald and pudgy and has four kids with Cindy Lou, his beautiful prom queen who got pregnant in the Taco Bell parking lot. Or at least that how I’d like to think it goes down. In any case, I raised my daughter telling her that geeks make the best husbands. You just have to wait awhile for them to mature. Once they do, they’re hot property, so the best bet it to snag one just as he is coming into his own.
Here are the best reasons to go geek:
- They’re usually really smart. That means they are more likely to have a great sense of humor and be witty. Wit is, in my humble opinion, one of the key characteristics that makes a guy a keeper.
- Geeks have suffered. It’s true that one needs to know suffering to know joy, and geeks have generally survived a painfully awkward social stage. They’re not cocky.
- They are extremely earnest. They have no game. Aaahhhh, how refreshing.
- Geeks are passionate and loyal. They tend to be a tad obsessive. This bodes well for both fidelity and sex.
- Geeks are patient. Almost all geek pursuits reward patience and tenacity. They won’t give up on you very easily.
- Parents love geeks for their good manners and their good jobs. My mother nicknamed my husband “the genius.” (She was just so relieved I didn’t marry the dumb frat rat.)
- Geeks are creative. When you get to know them, they are extremely interesting. They have hobbies!
OK, now we come to the hard part. When I wrote my Emo Guys post, it was really, really difficult to settle on ONLY ten really, really hot dudes. Maybe it’s because geeks fly under the radar, but I could only come up with a handful of hot, real geeks. I would like to point out however, that in For True Love, Pick a Beta Male, I sang the praises of John Krasinsky, Seth Rogan and Free Credit Report Guy. Beta males are closely related to geeks, in many cases are geeks, so I hope you’ll give me partial credit for those three.
Here are the geeky guys I think are really hot, in order of appeal:
1. Demetri Martin, host of Comedy Central’s Important Things With Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin
2. Justin Long, MAC guy and star of He’s Just Not That Into You
Justin Long
3. Jimmy Fallon, star of Fever Pitch and new Late Night host
Jimmy Fallon
4. Jemaine Clement, Flight of the Conchords
Jemaine Clement
That’s it! That’s all I’ve got! If I include fictional characters, there’s always:
5. Seth Cohen, The OC
Seth Cohen
And there are famous geek actors that I just cannot justify as hot:
6. Michael Cera, star of Juno, Nick & Nora, etc.
Michael Cera
7. McLovin Guy
Christopher Mintz-Plasse
Help me out here! Who am I missing? Write it in the Comments!
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Geeks are great but in general, I think they lack confidence in approaching women. They are very shy. Maybe you could write some advice for the geeks on how to overcome their fear of the opposite sex. Since I make it a rule not to make the first move on a guy (I want to know that he IS really into me), I never get any geek love cause they are too intimidated to make the first move.
Of course, eventually geeks gather a little life experience and a little experience with the ladies goes a long way. They tend to be late bloomers but when they finally come to fruition they are badass! I'm all for the 30-something geeks!
I love geeks. I only wonder why you didn't put Bret McKensie up from Flight as well. He is my favorite geek. There is actually a dating site geek2geek.com for those of you who want to go find geeks. My mother actually told me about it because she thinks I should be looking for geeks.
Hmmm, I like the idea of advice for geeks. I can start by letting them know that you think they are badass haha! I agree that most women don't want to make the first move – from what I've seen geeks date women they've gotten to know gradually. These guys are not hanging out in bars looking for the random hookup!
Megan, THAT is a very good question. Bret definitely belongs on that list. I know Mel thinks so! I think it's because I have a little celebrity crush on Jemaine, and none on Bret. But he is cute, and I realize that many women might think he is really hot.
As for dating a geek, I say listen to your mother. And there's always the London Review of Books…..
My celbrity crush is on Bret. I wander the streets of New York hoping to see him. My friend actually had dinner at a family style restaurant next to them. I'm a tad bit jealous.
I always listen to my mother. I just have not had much luck finding my geeks in NYC. I think I may subscribe to the London Review of Books. I always thought I should live across the pond.
Let's not call them geeks, how about tech savvy? And who is the Free Credit Report guy anyway!?!? The last guy I “dated” could be considered a “geek” inasmuch as he worked in the IT field, had an extensive knowledge of movies, and could tell you the differences between Star Wars and Star Trek to an nth degree. However, he was also a gym rat, played football, coached a basketball team, and knew more about pop culture than I did. He could drink like a frat boy, and could rock my world between the sheets. He was in fact just my type. Geek…….with bad boy tendencies. Hope this made some sort of sense.
Another idea is to set up house in Silicon Valley!
Oh man, he sounds perfect! Makes total sense to me. Yeah, tech savvy is a good description, tho they are not always techy types. As for Free Credit Report guy, he is adorable, even if he is a bit downwardly mobile haha. Check him out on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HksXMVhxdxY
Is this Walsh woman for real? If she has a Wharton MBA, and looks decent, she should be able to land a man by now. My guess is there is something mighty strange about her.
Bill, OMG I am laughing so hard right now. Well, there is something mighty strange about me, but that didn't stop my husband from falling for me anyway 25 years ago. I'm not sure why you assumed I hadn't “landed a man.” That's priceless.
I used to prefer dating Geeks – the type who feels more comfortable playing video games at home than going out with friends. My last Ex was intelligent, successful (on Wall Street), trustworthy, and had no “game.” After we broke up, I found out that he had slept with numerous prostitutes, before and after me. Since its extremely difficult for him to meet girls in social situations, this was the most convenient way for him to get IT done. I'm not saying all geeks are like this, but now I wonder if it makes more sense to date a guy who knows how to get the girl he wants. Yes, geeks do worship you while you are with them and tend to have straight-laced reputations, but who knows what they do in their homes, all alone with their thoughts…….
WTF!!!!!! Prostitutes? OMG, that turns my whole theory on its head. OK, so how about a guy who is not a player, who is not a geek, but who is a nice, normal, corn-fed guy with average social skills and a good heart? Does he exist? arrrghghghggh
As one of those 30-something geeks, here's some quick advice for younger geeks is:
1. Take up hobbies that don't have a 10 to 1 gender ratio working against you. Take a cooking class,
learn to knit, take yoga. Obviously, it won't do much good if it's not a hobby that involves going somewhere and meeting people, so just watching Lifetime isn't going to do it. But if you're a geek, there's a good chance that you're excellent at mastering skills and bodies of knowledge — this is just like that, minus the computer screen.
2. Yes, many women go for the guys whose knuckles drag on the ground when they walk. Life's just that way. But there are still plenty of women out there who don't, and you only have to find one special one. Not everyone will be attracted to you, but there's nothing wrong with that. If all you do is obsess about the girls who aren't into you, how will you find the ones who are?
3. There are lots of things these days about how to be a “pickup artist,” and some of them probably even work. Don't bother with these if what you want is to find a girlfriend. But do try to be at least a little casual about things — you don't wan't to look like a stalker. The main thing to remember: don't obsess over some girl you've barely even talked to as though she's the only chance for a date that you will ever have in your lifetime — even though waiting is hard, time is actually on your side here.
4. Online dating sites are a great boon to shy people. Bonus points for sites where replying to people's personal ads isn't the whole purpose of a site — it makes it a lot easier to start up a conversation.
5. Hygiene is your friend. Enough said.
6. It's not an accident that this is pretty similar to good dating advice for women that you can find on the internet. Women are generally much smarter about looking for this information as well as sharing it. You can read lots of good advice on sites targeted primarily at women. Iif you feel the need to clear your browser history afterward and deny you ever went there to your friends, that's okay too.
Awwww, Will, thanks for commenting! I love it that you are looking out for younger geeks! Seriously, geeky guys have the last laugh, in my opinion. My friends and I all pretty much married geeks. The men joke that they NEVER could have dated us in high school.
I hear from many young women about the qualities they will seek when they are ready to settle down. If they're smart, and confident, they will choose smart men who have integrity and the capacity for real love. And that population is heavily represented by geeks. Geeky guys are the best!
As one of those 30-something geeks, here's some quick advice for younger geeks is:
1. Take up hobbies that don't have a 10 to 1 gender ratio working against you. Take a cooking class,
learn to knit, take yoga. Obviously, it won't do much good if it's not a hobby that involves going somewhere and meeting people, so just watching Lifetime isn't going to do it. But if you're a geek, there's a good chance that you're excellent at mastering skills and bodies of knowledge — this is just like that, minus the computer screen.
2. Yes, many women go for the guys whose knuckles drag on the ground when they walk. Life's just that way. But there are still plenty of women out there who don't, and you only have to find one special one. Not everyone will be attracted to you, but there's nothing wrong with that. If all you do is obsess about the girls who aren't into you, how will you find the ones who are?
3. There are lots of things these days about how to be a “pickup artist,” and some of them probably even work. Don't bother with these if what you want is to find a girlfriend. But do try to be at least a little casual about things — you don't wan't to look like a stalker. The main thing to remember: don't obsess over some girl you've barely even talked to as though she's the only chance for a date that you will ever have in your lifetime — even though waiting is hard, time is actually on your side here.
4. Online dating sites are a great boon to shy people. Bonus points for sites where replying to people's personal ads isn't the whole purpose of a site — it makes it a lot easier to start up a conversation.
5. Hygiene is your friend. Enough said.
6. It's not an accident that this is pretty similar to good dating advice for women that you can find on the internet. Women are generally much smarter about looking for this information as well as sharing it. You can read lots of good advice on sites targeted primarily at women. Iif you feel the need to clear your browser history afterward and deny you ever went there to your friends, that's okay too.
Awwww, Will, thanks for commenting! I love it that you are looking out for younger geeks! Seriously, geeky guys have the last laugh, in my opinion. My friends and I all pretty much married geeks. The men joke that they NEVER could have dated us in high school.
I hear from many young women about the qualities they will seek when they are ready to settle down. If they're smart, and confident, they will choose smart men who have integrity and the capacity for real love. And that population is heavily represented by geeks. Geeky guys are the best!
As a *younger* college age geek, I’ve noticed that one of the biggest setbacks is bad timing. Many of us eventually work up the courage to ask a girl out, but only long after she has passed us off as uninterested.
Hi Ben, thanks for commenting! I’ve actually recommended to women in several posts that they need to patiently indicate strong interest with guys who are not players. I think many women, even when interested, may seem unapproachable. Women like for men to pursue (no risk of rejection, obviously), but I think in the current culture, women need to take more initiative with guys who might be relationship material. If a woman is holding eye contact with you for three seconds at a time, she’s attracted. Strike up a convo, and suggest hanging out, or even studying together. It doesn’t have to be a date date, just grabbing lunch or coffee is good. Start slow, but early.