‘Tis the Season to Be A Bit Naughty

December 24, 2010

Back by popular demand!

This was my holiday “card” to my readers last year. No judgment, no “I told you so’s.” Just a reminder to stay safe, and don’t put up with crap from anyone! I’ve decided to take a break until after New Year’s – something I’ve never done before on HUS. Until then, I wish you all lovely holidays!

On the twelve days of Christmas my hookup gave to me:

Twelve empty promises

Eleven jealous biddies

Ten broken condoms

Nine drunken gropings

Eight bullshit excuses

Seven “Now flip over’s”

Six jackhammers

Five STDs

Four walks of shame

Three booty calls

Two limp dicks

and a threesome with my roommate!

If you’re ever going to do the casual thing, I can’t think of a better time than the holidays.

  • Parties, parties, parties where you’re drunky, drunky, drunky.

  • If you’re home visiting on break, you’ve got a built-in expiration date. What happens in Hometown stays in Hometown.

  • New Year’s resolutions are just around the corner, so it makes sense to be bad before you have to be good. That way you’ll see more improvement.

  • Most senior people are out of the office, so you can come in late, hungover, and sext all day long without catching any grief.

    The risk of a month-long holiday emo hangover can be minimized by getting naughty with someone who’s actually nice.

    Photo: lucidtruth