About
Mission Statement
HookingUpSmart.com aims to support women and men in their search for meaningful relationships by providing strategic insight, guidance, and perspective as they manage their social and sexual interactions. It’s a place to laugh, learn and commiserate about everything related to romance and longing.
About Me, Susan Walsh
Strategy Consultant
Since earning my MBA in 1983 from The Wharton School, I have worked with companies and non-profit organizations to identify key challenges and opportunities, and formulate winning strategies. Launched in November, 2008, Hooking Up Smart brings together my passion and concern for young women with a professional, practical and systematic problem-solving approach.
Cool Mom
I came of age during the 70s and 80s, witnessing (and enjoying) the effects of the sexual revolution. Our generation straddled the line between traditional dating and hooking up, and I’ve experienced the pros and cons of each. In recent years, I’ve been a mentor and counselor to young women trying to navigate the hookup culture and find love in a hostile climate. I’ve learned firsthand that smart, young women are capable of great things armed with encouragement and good information.
What is Hooking Up?[1. Bogle, Kathleen A. Hooking Up: Sex, Dating, and Relationships on Campus. New York: New York University Press, 2008.]
- Hooking up is a term to describe a sexual encounter between two people. It is a deliberately vague expression, and can mean making out, having intercourse, or anything in between.
- Hooking up has replaced traditional dating on college campuses, and has also become prevalent in the general population and culture. The hallmark of hooking up is the clear understanding between both parties that the encounter will be free from any expectations for further contact. It is designed to avoid the possibility of commitment. However, hooking up is still the primary pathway to a potential romantic relationship.
- The hookup script reverses the sexual norm; the pair becomes sexual first, before emotional intimacy or a relationship is established.
Hooking Up Stats
- 91% of students report that hooking up is very common or fairly common on their campuses.[2. Glenn, Norval and Marquardt, Elizabeth. "Hooking Up, Hanging Out and Hoping for Mr. Right - College Women on Mating and Dating Today." Institute for American Values. July, 2001.]
- 87% of college students report having hooked up.[3. Kahn, Fricker, Hoffman, Lambert, Tripp and Childress. "Hooking up: Dangerous new dating methods?" American Psychological Association Symposium: Sex, unwanted, sex, and sexual assault on college campuses. 2000.]
- 73% of girls wish dating was more common.[4. "The Truth About Hooking Up." Cosmopolitan. October, 2008: 190-1.]
- 12% of hookups eventually lead to relationships.[5. Hayes, Allison, McManus, Brian and Paul, Elizabeth. "Hookups: Characteristics and Correlates of College Students' Spontaneous and Anonymous Sexual Experiences." The Journal of Sex Research. February, 2000.]
- 60% of sexually active teenagers will at some point have sex with someone they are not dating.[6. Manning, Giordano, and Longmore. "Hooking up: The relationship contexts of 'non-relationship' sex." Journal of Adolescent Research, 21(5), 2006: 459-483.]
- 49% of students who have intercourse during a hookup never see the other person again.[7. Bogle, Kathleen A. Hooking Up: Sex, Dating, and Relationships on Campus. New York: New York University Press, 2008.]
- 61% of women who say hooking up makes them feel desirable also say it makes them feel awkward.[8. Glenn, Norval and Marquardt, Elizabeth. "Hooking Up, Hanging Out and Hoping for Mr. Right - College Women on Mating and Dating Today." Institute for American Values. July, 2001.]
- 44% of the time guys have an orgasm during a hookup, while girls have orgasms only 19% of the time.[9. "The Truth About Hooking Up." Cosmopolitan. October, 2008: 190-1. England, Paula, PhD, Professor of Sociology, Stanford University.]
- 12% of women say that it is sometimes easier to have sex with a guy they don’t know than to make conversation.[10. Glenn, Norval and Marquardt, Elizabeth. "Hooking Up, Hanging Out and Hoping for Mr. Right - College Women on Mating and Dating Today." Institute for American Values. July, 2001.]
Please feel free to contact me using the form below. I welcome all questions, comments and feedback!
[...] up is by nature an incredibly stupid, sexual market value-killing act. She even acknowledges this, repeatedly citing a statistic that says only twelve percent of hookups lead to relationships. I don’t know about you, but [...]
Hey Susan,
Us at Leftos have really enjoyed your blog ever since we came across it. In the middle of this coming January, we'll be launching new designs and features for Leftos.com. Along with this launch, we are going to be changing our company's blog to be more of a resource. One of the things we're going to do is take popular questions asked by Leftos users on the site and have guest bloggers answer them. We'd love to have you guest blog once or twice.
If you're interested, please email Ken@Leftos.com and he'll be able to explain more about it.
Thanks
-Leftos
Medical Defintion of Rape:
Please note this part: “Date rape is a sexual assault in which the victim is psychologically pressured…..before the rape.” (below).
“
Definition of Rape
Rape: Forced sexual intercourse; sexual assault; sexual intercourse between an adult and a minor. Rape may be heterosexual (involving members of opposite sexes) or homosexual (involving members of the same sex). Rape involves insertion of an erect penis or an inanimate object into the female vagina or the male anus. Legal definitions of rape may also include forced oral sex and other sexual acts.
Heterosexual rape usually refers to an assault in which a male forces himself upon a female, and homosexual rape usually refers to an assault in which a male forces himself upon another male. However, both terms (heterosexual and homosexual rape) have been used to refer to an assault in which a female forces herself upon a male or a female.
Sexual intercourse between an adult and a minor is known legally as statutory rape. The adult can be found guilty of statutory rape even if the minor was a willing partner.
Gang rape is a sexual assault in which several persons force themselves upon a victim.
Date rape is a sexual assault in which the victim is psychologically pressured, drugged or sedated before the rape. Date rape is so-named because it often involves a dating couple. The male may spike a female’s alcoholic beverage, making her unable to resist his advances or even unable to remember the rape.
Would-be date rapists have used sleeping pills to sedate their intended victims.
In addition to adding sleep-inducing medications to alcohol, date rapists also have combined them with marijuana, cocaine and other drugs.
Rape can also occur in a marriage. Typically, the husband forces himself on his wife at a time when she is unwilling to have sexual intercourse.
Victims of rape suffer physical and mental trauma.
Physical trauma may include cuts, bruises and abrasions in the pelvic area as well as elsewhere on the body.
Mental trauma may include overwhelming feelings of humiliation, embarrassment and defilement.
Rape victims should seek treatment at a hospital. There, doctors and nurses can treat the injuries, administer antibiotics to prevent sexually- transmitted diseases, and provide counseling or any other additional therapy (mental or physical) that the patient requires.
The hospital team’s evaluation and report will help document the condition of the patient for legal purposes.
“Rape” is derived from the Latin word “rapere” (to seize).
Last Editorial Review: 1/26/2000
None of this is news to me. I'm not sure why you posted this here?
[...] Penis Do and it’s part of series called Tales of Mere Existence by Levni Yilmaz. Thanks to Susan Walsh for initially posting the link to this [...]
Susan, I've been banned from his blog, but I thought you might find my rebuttal interesting to read:
http://butterflysquash.wordpress.com/2010/02/19...