Hooking Up Realities

What Rules Govern Exclusivity in Dating?

June 23, 2016
What Rules Govern Exclusivity in Dating?

During a recent coaching session a client asked if it was weird that a guy wanted to be exclusive with her after six dates. (She thought that was fast.) I was somewhat taken aback, as my own bias suggests that if a guy isn’t willing to be exclusive after six dates, it’s time to move […]

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Take the Hooking Up Smart Dating Quiz!

June 3, 2016
Take the Hooking Up Smart Dating Quiz!

You think you know all about hookup culture? Maybe you do because you’re a regular HUS reader, ha. Maybe you think the dating market is worse – or better – than it really is (depending on your perspective). Maybe you’re a worried parent, or a guy who worries about not having enough sexual experience.  Maybe […]

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Helen Fisher on How We Love

June 2, 2016
Helen Fisher on How We Love

Here’s Helen Fisher talking about the three different hormonal systems that can trigger love. She makes the point that casual sex is never casual – amen to that. Her research also dovetails very well with Jonathan Haidt’s work on passionate vs. companionate love. 

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The Blowjob as Snow Job

April 7, 2016
The Blowjob as Snow Job

Peggy Orenstein’s new book Girls and Sex: Navigating the New Landscape has kicked up a lot of interest. Many are alarmed by her findings based on 70 interviews, but there’s nothing much that surprises me there. From Amazon: “While the media has focused—often to sensational effect—on the rise of casual sex and the prevalence of […]

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Casual Sex Lessons

March 1, 2016
Casual Sex Lessons

At Bustle, Kristen Sollee recently wrote 6 Valuable Lessons I Learned From Having Casual Sex. Sollee’s bio: “Kristen is the founding editrix of Slutist, a sex positive feminist site…that aims to uncover and undress the intersections between sex, gender, sexuality and feminism in art, culture and politics.” I find her article fascinating in that it provides a […]

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