Mismatched Lust Between the Sexes

OKCupid founder Christian Rudder has a new book out: Dataclysm: Who We Are (When We Think No One’s Looking). Rudder is the guy responsible for the always fascinating OKTrends blog, which he started in 2009. From Nate Silver’s blog Five Thirty Eight, we learn that Dataclysm is based on Rudder’s OKTrends posts, for which he spent countless hours crunching data in Excel.

Rudder’s first chapter covers the basics of sexual attraction, and highlights how the sexes differ in this regard.

“Women who are, say, 28 find guys who are also 28 about the most attractive, and so forth. Up until about 40, when that’s getting too old.”


Actually, you can see that before age 29 women prefer men 1-3 years older. After 30, they prefer men younger than themselves. Rudder is careful to point out that this is not about choosing a long-term partner, it’s simply a measurement of who women find hot.

“This is attractiveness votes, so think of this as our proxy for lust.”

Rudder then showed the male version: [Read more...]


Hookup Culture and the Golden Rule

A viable strategy for the 21st century?

A viable strategy for the 21st century?

Conor Friedersdorf’s article When ‘Do Unto Others’ Meets Hookup Culture in today’s Atlantic poses a refreshing and overdue question: Why are traditional conservatives hellbent on fighting contemporary sexual mores with doomsday predictions of the end of Western civilization as we know it? Smug predictions of eternal damnation for sexual sinners are the cherry on top of this Judgment sundae. Quoting Damon Linker on the tradcon perspective:

“From the fourth century, down to roughly my grandparents’ generation, the vast majority of people in the Western world believed without question that masturbation, pre-marital sex, and promiscuity were wrong, that out-of-wedlock pregnancy was shameful, that adultery was a serious sin, that divorce should either be banned or allowed only in the rarest of situations, and that homosexual desires were gravely disordered and worthy of severe punishment.

…Some of our fellow citizens (religious traditionalists and other social conservatives) are terrified by the new dispensation.”

This terror is expressed daily in the Christo-manosphere. But how effective is this strategy in changing minds and shifting the culture? [Read more...]


The Insidious, Intractable Problem of Street Harassment

Street harassment of women is ubiquitous. It never stops and no one is ever immune. God help me, yesterday I got harassed at Costco by a guy half my age while looking at car mats!

“Baby, I’ma take you on a nice ride.”

Obviously, the only conceivable motive was to make me feel uncomfortable. And it worked – I was in a remote corner of the store and I felt scared. I fled without picking up the item I needed.

The defense that this is a form of compliment is totally bogus – the guy wore a smirk and clearly enjoyed my discomfort. It’s a form of bullying.

This short documentary on street harassment features a former Miss District of Columbia and is worth a watch.

[Read more...]


Female Economic Independence Changes Attitudes Toward Promiscuity

women networkingThe titillatingly titled article Why Some People Get Enraged When Women Have Sex in NY Magazine reports on an interesting pair of new studies. Female Economic Dependence and the Morality of Promiscuity (Price, Pound and Scott, 2014) asked 5K Americans what they believe about promiscuity both male and female.

They then analyzed the correlation between those views and female economic dependence within the subjects’ own social circles. Female median income alone explained male and female attitudes towards promiscuity.

[Read more...]


Your Looks, Your Call

There’s been a disturbing and predictable trend of guys getting online to lecture women on what’s hot and what’s not. A recent notable example is this video from Vine teen celebrity Nash Grier and pals:

The video generated a great deal of blowback. My favorite rebuttal is from Hank Green, (vlogger and brother of John Green of TFIOS fame):

[Read more...]