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Push-Pull is Flirting for Sociopaths

Indexedx

Source: Indexed, Jessica Hagy

One of the most insidious results of hookup culture is the retreat to the Principle of Least Interest – which says that the person who cares the least in a relationship is the one with the most power. 

Although research shows that most college students would prefer a relationship over casual sex, it’s become uncool to feel that way. It’s most prevalent among guys, but girls also fake indifference about relationships. They go for the casual hookup hoping it will turn into something more. 

Back in the days when traditional dating was the norm, playing hard-to-get was a viable strategy for women.

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Book Review: Skin In the Game

skinI first encountered Neely Steinberg in 2010 when she wrote a piece for the Boston Globe entitled Dating Like an Entrepreneur. As someone who frequently thinks of dating in behavioral economic terms, I was drawn to the pragmatic and sensible model she described. Shortly thereafter, she invited me onto her local call-in radio show to talk about dating and hookup culture. We’ve remained in touch since then, and it’s been a pleasure to see her develop a successful career as a dating coach for women.

Now Neely has written Skin In the Game: Unleashing Your Inner Entrepreneur to Find Love

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Haunted By His Promiscuous Past

Dear Susan,

I have been dating this guy for about a year and a half now. I love him, and loves me. He is my best friend, and he claims I am his. However, his promiscuous past seems to always be getting in between us, mostly, just bugging me. We met when he was a senior in college, and I a freshman.

I had a big crush on him, and when finally a mutual friend introduced us we clicked right away. We talked for an entire month via email and skype over winter break right after we first met, and as soon as we were both back together in school, it was instant chemistry and it did not take long for us to start dating.

Recently though, I found out about his promiscuous past. He decided to tell me about all his past sexual encounters, all names and times he had been with each partner.. A bit too much information. He had been with a total of eight girls before me. The first one was the girl he lost his virginity to in high school, who was his girlfriend for a bit. Then in college, he went a little crazy. He slept with a few girls his freshman year. His sophomore year he dated a girl for about 6 months or so, until she cheated on him and started dating another guy. He said that she fucked with his heart, so he became more promiscuous then ever. From his junior year of college until his second semester senior year, when we got together, he slept with many girls many times. A total of five or six girls in one year and a half.

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Dad Not Cad

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Do Less Attractive Guys Make Better Boyfriends?

One very common misperception I see among women is the belief that character is strongly correlated to looks. In particular, women tend to assume that a very good looking guy is bound to be a douchebag, while his far less attractive buddy is potential boyfriend material:

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