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QuoteI know there is no single right answer here, but how would you define a man to be a "real man"? Put another way, what qualities would you see in a man that would make you think he"s an alpha male in life and not just in relationships? I ask because I wasn"t raised with a good, strong male role model so I became the standard "nice guy" that is also a people pleaser, but I"m now trying to change that. What is it that makes a man a real man and how do I develop those traits?
6:41 am
December 22, 2011
OfflineOne that isn"t complex, because then he would have an imaginary component, therefore not strictly real.
On a more serious note: this question kind of reminds me of "what constitutes a race?" It does not have an answer, because attributes that would describe one vary in a continuous manner geographically, not do they cluster very well.
In the same way, it"s hard to say what a real man is, because even if there is consensus about what a real man looks like on one spot, it will change when deviating from one geographical location. If there are any quasi-universal characteristics, my subjective answer would be:
- Be an individual, be prepared to criticize the status quo if you"re certain to have evidence to support it (meaning: don"t criticize the consensus on a subject, just because you feel like and want to look like a "rebel", it must be well funded to some degree).
- When proven wrong (meaning: your arguments have been proven false as objectively as possible, which is hard to measure), swallow your pride. If not proven wrong, stay the course but reassess your position from time to time.
- Help those that have helped you, and offer help to those that have gained your respect. Reject emotional manipulation of those that did not gain it, or even broke it. Let karma hit them.
- Must possess or have possessed one of following: penis, set of balls, … other male only organs
Now, in no way am I stating that this list is what makes a man compared to a woman (as in: this is what separates a man from a woman), except for the last point somewhat. There are still a bunch of exceptions to that last point, but I like to think I have distilled the essence here. If not quasi-universal, I still hold them dear to my heart.
Also: male video game campers can never be real men. Never.
I"m deeply suspicious of the use of the term "real man" – more often than not it"s used to manipulate and shame men, when the corresponding statement about women ("a real woman would…") never rears its head. No one gets to dictate your masculinity to you.
That said, masculine qualities I admire are: emotional stability, independent judgement, and decisiveness.
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