Relationship Benchmark #4: There is Consistent Expression of Affection and Feeling

August 5, 2016
Relationship Benchmark #4: There is Consistent Expression of Affection and Feeling

One of the best things about being in a relationship is the reward of love flowing both ways. We require that our partner express affection and deep feelings consistently. We feel free to express our love and are open to receiving it in return. In contrast, a relationship where we never quite know where we stand, or how our […]

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Relationship Benchmark #3: There Is a Strong Mutual Physical Attraction

July 21, 2016
Relationship Benchmark #3: There Is a Strong Mutual Physical Attraction

A note from Susan: I’m moving next week! After nearly 20 years, we’re leaving our big, old Victorian for a new adventure. It’s too big, it’s too old, and I feel like Tom on Downton Abbey. Our kids are well settled in their own lives, so we’re returning to Cambridge, where we started out in the […]

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Relationship Benchmark #2: There is No Drama or Mystery

July 19, 2016
Relationship Benchmark #2: There is No Drama or Mystery

Relationships characterized by drama or mystery are fraught with tension and conflict. Drama and mystery are separate but related concepts, and in the worst relationships you can often observe both at work. They may be initiated by one or both partners, creating dysfunction and often abuse. Successful relationships have ZERO drama or mystery. What is relationship drama? […]

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Doubts While Dating Help You Find Your True Partner

July 12, 2016
Doubts While Dating Help You Find Your True Partner

I’ve been getting valuable and mostly positive feedback regarding my current series about ten ways to know whether your relationship is the real deal. I’ve also received several emails from readers wanting clarification. Everyone who dates is plagued by doubts as long as they are dating people they’re not going to marry. The whole point of dating is to […]

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Benchmark #1: You Have No Doubts

July 6, 2016
Benchmark #1: You Have No Doubts

In my last post I laid out ten criteria for judging whether a new relationship is likely to last. Several of you have requested that I go into more detail on each of the criteria, and I think that’s a good idea. Let’s review each one in turn and discuss how each might be useful to you. Today’s benchmark, […]

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