In this era of sexual free-for-all, one of the most difficult things to figure out is the proper timing for having sex. For women, there are usually tradeoffs involved in diving between the sheets. Even if we decide to “have sex like a man,” it’s not possible, because the sexual double standard is alive and [...]
Tags: A New Mode, Ask a Dude, Bobby Rio, casual sex, College Candy, hook up, hooking up, John Ortved, Leftos, one-night stand, relationship advice, sex, Single-ish, TSB Magazine
As I wrote in Learning to Speak Hookup: A Pocket Phrasebook, the vocabulary surrounding the navigation of sex and relationships has become nearly incomprehensible. In the Hookup language, there are many irregularities and exceptions to the rule. It’s also heavily dependent on context. With so much misunderstanding, young people spend a great deal of time [...]
Tags: booty call, booty calls, boyfriend, cheating, date, dating, drama, emotions, friendship, girlfriend, girls, having sex, high maintenance, hook up, hookup, just friends, make out, penis, player, psycho, relationship, relationships, sex, sex and relationships, spooning, text, vibe, video games, women
Posted by Susan Walsh on Oct 28, 2009 in
Ask Susan,
Hooking Up Realities Dear Susan,
Now that midterms are over, I’m starting to think about going home for Thanksgiving. I’m worried about making the wrong choices. Actually, I’m worried I’ll make the same wrong choice several times over in the four days that I’m home. Last summer I had a thing with a guy. [...]
Tags: advice, blog, booty call, college, douche, drama, dry spell, emotions, fling, friends with benefits, girl, going home, guy, guys, having sex, hook up, hooking up, love, men, relationship, relationships, sex, strong chemistry, thanksgiving, vagina
I love Jason Mraz’s song I’m Yours. Doesn’t every woman? It’s been on Billboard’s Top 100 chart for 74 weeks, a record. It’s the third-best selling digital song of all time, having sold 4.4 million downloads, and it’s still going strong. Why?
Surrender.
“Well you done done me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be [...]
Tags: anthem, art of war, art of war by sun tzu, attachment, battle of the sexes, bed, billboard, Billboard's Top 100, blue october, chill, cold shoulder, commitment, connection, cracks, cult, dating, ego, emo, ex, fall, fall in love, fool, friend, girl, girlfriend, girls, guy, guys, hand, hand job, heart, hipster, hook up, hooking up, hookup, hot, I'm Yours, IM, intimacy, jason mraz, LA, love, lovesick fool, lucky girl, male, men, mind, NY, open, power, preemptive strike, random, relationship, relationships, reluctance, Say It, sex, signs, smart, TA, talk, teenage girls, together, top of the charts, upper hand, wit, women
Posted by Susan Walsh on Sep 21, 2009 in
Personal Development,
Relationship Strategies Brett and Kate McKay write The Art of Manliness, a successful personal development blog that is tailored to men, but contains many excellent, thoughtful articles that I enjoy. Recently, they wrote about a general condition of restlessness and anxiousness in our society, a sort of general malaise. They define it as feeling like there’s this great [...]
Tags: Art of Manliness, college, college campuses, commitment, epidemic, fall in love, general malaise, girl, guy, guys, happiness, happy endings, hook up, hooking up, hookup, love, marriage, media, men, movie sales, Personal Development, porn, regret, relationship, relationships, restlessness, romantic, sex, thoughtful articles, true love, weekend, young women
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So from my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
Jimmy Soul, 1970
Do beautiful women have a harder time finding real love? I bet Jennifer Aniston thinks so. The woman in this photo writes the [...]
Tags: bar, beautiful women, blog, boyfriend, challenge, confidence, date, dating, douche, douchebag, drunk, eye contact, feelings, Frat, friendship, girl, girlfriend, girls, guy, Guyland, heterosexual, high school, hook up, hooking up, hookup, hot, ideal, love, male, masculinity, Michael Kimmel, New York, nice guys, NY, player, porn, power, rejection, relationship, relationships, sex, short film, single, singles, smart, smile, status, success, talk, text
Amy Johnson is a psychologist and life coach who answers questions about relationships. In a recent post, she identified the three most common themes in the letters she receives from people. The commentary is mine.
1. You already know the answer.
People regularly write asking for a fresh analysis of events, even though they already know what’s [...]
Tags: boyfriend, breakup, commitment, date, dating, drama, friend, friendship, hook up, hooking up, love, men, relationship, relationship expert, relationships, signals, talk, text, text message, together, women
Posted by Susan Walsh on Aug 3, 2009 in
Relationship Strategies,
What Guys Want “Joey: You waited too long and now you’re in ‘The Friend Zone’.
Ross: No, I’m not in the Zone.
Joey: Come on, Ross; you’re mayor of the Zone!”
Friends
I’m one of those cynics who thinks it is really, really difficult for guys and girls to maintain platonic friendships. I think it works best when:
One or [...]
Tags: advice, awkward, best buds, boyfriend, communication, crush, douche, douchebag, ego, emo, ex, eye contact, fall, fantasy, feelings, friend, friend zone, friendship, girl, girls, guy, guys, hand, hanging out, having sex, honest, hook up, hos, IM, joey, kiss, kisses, loser, male, men, online, open, penis, plan, platonic friends, platonic friendships, random, relationship, relationships, romantic, ross, sex, sexual history, sexual tension, signs, TA, talk, text, touch, unrealistic expectations, wit, women
Posted by Susan Walsh on Jul 15, 2009 in
Personal Development,
Relationship Strategies “Decide what you want and then go get it.”
“You can be anything you want to be.”
“You get what you ask for in this life.”
“You’ll never know unless you try.”
These are some of the principles that have guided my own life. I’m a doer, a go-getter. I’m achievement oriented, though I’ll be the first to confess [...]
Tags: casual sex, dating, friend, friendship, getting what you want, hook up, hooking up, hookup, plan, platonic friends, relationship, relationships, sex, sexual tension, strategy, success, women
“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”
Wayne Gretzky
As far as I can tell, there are three different camps of guys that girls love to gossip about:
1. Guys they have the hots for.
2. Guys that suck.
Note: “Guys they have the hots for” often progress to “guys that suck” over time.
3. Guys they [...]
Tags: babies, boys, breakup, crush, date, dating, ego, emotional intimacy, friend, friendship, geeks, girl, girls, gossip, grad school, guy, hook up, hooking up, hot, jerks, just friends, love, man code, nerd, nice guys, penis, platonic friends, platonic friendships, player, relationship, relationship material, relationships, strategies, success, wayne gretzky, women
