Posted by Susan Walsh on Mar 19, 2010 in
Relationship Strategies I’m traveling today, so I’m bringing you an older post that many of my newer readers will have missed. I originally called it Dating Advice From a Dead Virgin, and it didn’t generate a lot of traffic. Hmmm….maybe I should just have entitled it Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy. Either way, it’s still full of [...]
Tags: advice, attraction, chase, dating, desperation, Elizabeth Bennett, Emma, flirt, friendship, guy, guys, heart, honest, humor, Jane Austen, love, Mr. Darcy, Mr. Right, open, Persuasion, player, Pride and Prejudice, relationship material, respect, self-esteem, Sense and Sensibility, sex, spontaneous, trust, virgin, wit
Posted by Susan Walsh on Dec 27, 2009 in
Ask Susan,
Hooking Up Realities,
What Guys Want Dear Susan,
I am a college student in my senior year, and recently ended a 3-year-long relationship. There’s a great, gorgeous girl that I’ve been getting to know, and I’ve been focusing some of my “attention” towards her. I had a big date event coming up so I asked her to it, which meant going away for [...]
Tags: college senior, hooking up, hookup, no-strings sex, player, random hookups, relationship advice
As I wrote in Learning to Speak Hookup: A Pocket Phrasebook, the vocabulary surrounding the navigation of sex and relationships has become nearly incomprehensible. In the Hookup language, there are many irregularities and exceptions to the rule. It’s also heavily dependent on context. With so much misunderstanding, young people spend a great deal of time [...]
Tags: booty call, booty calls, boyfriend, cheating, date, dating, drama, emotions, friendship, girlfriend, girls, having sex, high maintenance, hook up, hookup, just friends, make out, penis, player, psycho, relationship, relationships, sex, sex and relationships, spooning, text, vibe, video games, women
Dear Susan,
I’m a 21 year-old college student, so I’m completely immersed in the hookup culture. Like many girls I know, I’ve been hurt by a number of jerks and players that I dated. A while back, I decided to stick to nice guys, but it’s very difficult to trust anyone. I can’t stand the idea [...]
Tags: anticipation, bad boys, breakup, college, commitment, communication, confidence, date, dating, drama, feelings, friend, friend zone, friendship, girl, girls, guy, having sex, heartbreak, honest, hookup, hookup culture, intimacy, jerks, love, mature, nice guys, player, players, power, relationship, respect, strategy, text, women
Posted by Susan Walsh on Sep 28, 2009 in
Relationship Strategies,
What Guys Want Manolith, a men’s lifestyle online magazine, recently ran the article 20 Reasons You’re Still Single. I was delighted to learn that there are apparently a significant number of men who want a relationship and need advice. The piece addresses a wide range of typical male weaknesses, including questionable hygiene, douchebaggery and being “too nice.”
One of [...]
Tags: bad boys, beautiful women, beer goggles, BFF, booty call, boyfriend, boys, challenge, chick flick, Chuck Bass, commitment, control, date, douchebag, drunk, emotional intimacy, eye contact, feelings, girls, guy, guys, hanging out, hard to get, head over heels, hooking up, hookup, hookup culture, hygiene, independent, jealousy, love, male, party, player, power, psycho, pursue, rejection, relationship, relationships, sex, sexual tension, smile, spontaneous, text, The Game, weekend, y chromosome
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So from my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
Jimmy Soul, 1970
Do beautiful women have a harder time finding real love? I bet Jennifer Aniston thinks so. The woman in this photo writes the [...]
Tags: bar, beautiful women, blog, boyfriend, challenge, confidence, date, dating, douche, douchebag, drunk, eye contact, feelings, Frat, friendship, girl, girlfriend, girls, guy, Guyland, heterosexual, high school, hook up, hooking up, hookup, hot, ideal, love, male, masculinity, Michael Kimmel, New York, nice guys, NY, player, porn, power, rejection, relationship, relationships, sex, short film, single, singles, smart, smile, status, success, talk, text
Wouldn’t it be great if you could take one look at someone’s face and know if they were relationship material? It turns out that people are remarkably accurate at predicting just that. A study at Durham University in England showed that Boyfriends look significantly different than Players. Check out this example:
At first I thought these [...]
Tags: babies, beauty, boyfriend, boys, brow ridges, clive owen, college, college students, commitment, composites, emo, facial characteristics, fling, foreheads, Frat, geeks, genes, girl, girls, guy, guys, heterosexual, hookup, intuition, jaws, jock, long term relationship, love, male, masculinity, matthew fox, noses, nsa sex, one-night stand, party, player, promiscuous, relationship, relationship material, relationships, sex, specimen, strategies, throwbacks, university in england, women
“Be extremely subtle, even to the point of formlessness. Be extremely mysterious, even to the point of soundlessness. Thereby you can be the director of the opponent’s fate.”
Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Playing Hard To Get has traditionally been a woman’s game:
Woman is the desired object.
Man wants sex.
Man courts woman to gain access to sex.
Woman [...]
Tags: advice, beautiful women, challenge, date, dating, drama, guy, guys, hard to get, male, pickup lines, player, relationship, relationship potential, self-esteem, sex, smart, strategies, success, wit
There’s a new double-standard being applied to women in relationships, and it’s even more insidious than Studs. vs. Sluts. A favorite tactic of young men when questioned about their questionable behavior is to accuse the self-respecting woman of being a PSYCHO.
I’ll be the first to admit I’m not a licensed psychologist. I may dish out a [...]
Tags: alcohol, alpha male, Antisocial Personality Disorder, boys, cheating, dating, dbag, diagnosis, drunk, emotional intimacy, flirt, frat guy, friends with benefits, fuckwit, girl interrupted, healthy relationship college, Histrionic Personality Disorder, hooking up, issues, licensed psychologist, making drama, mixed message, mixed messages, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, Paranoid Personality Disorder, player, power, problem-solving, prognoses, psycho, questionable behavior, random, relationship potential, relationships, Schizoid Personality Disorder, self-respect, sex, sexual freedom, slut, spitting game, status, strategy, studs
“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”
Wayne Gretzky
As far as I can tell, there are three different camps of guys that girls love to gossip about:
1. Guys they have the hots for.
2. Guys that suck.
Note: “Guys they have the hots for” often progress to “guys that suck” over time.
3. Guys they [...]
Tags: babies, boys, breakup, crush, date, dating, ego, emotional intimacy, friend, friendship, geeks, girl, girls, gossip, grad school, guy, hook up, hooking up, hot, jerks, just friends, love, man code, nerd, nice guys, penis, platonic friends, platonic friendships, player, relationship, relationship material, relationships, strategies, success, wayne gretzky, women
