Tag: relationship advice

Relationship Benchmark #9: You Share the Same Values and Life Priorities

August 31, 2016
Relationship Benchmark #9: You Share the Same Values and Life Priorities

One of the most distinct changes in dating patterns in the last fifty years is the sharp increase in assortative mating – that is, marriage between very similar individuals. As that trend has increased, divorce has decreased, an apparent confirmation that while opposites attract they don’t stay together. Successful relationships happen when couples share the […]

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Relationship Benchmark #8: You Never Need to Apologize For Your Partner

August 25, 2016
Relationship Benchmark #8: You Never Need to Apologize For Your Partner

All of us have made excuses at one time or another for the bad behavior of someone close to us. Because we care about them and are loyal to them, we defend their actions, usually by attempting to explain circumstances that excuse it. “I’m sorry Charlie is so late, he’s under a ton of pressure […]

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Relationship Benchmark #7: You Don’t Need Advice About Your Relationship

August 19, 2016
Relationship Benchmark #7: You Don’t Need Advice About Your Relationship

Of all the relationship benchmarks I’ve written about in this series of posts, this is probably the one that needs the most clarification. Who hasn’t confided in a close friend or family member about a new relationship? We often doubt our own perceptions and can benefit from seeking advice from those with experience. Running questions by […]

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Relationship Benchmark #6: Strong Positive Reinforcement and Emotional Support

August 16, 2016
Relationship Benchmark #6: Strong Positive Reinforcement and Emotional Support

Many of the benchmarks of successful relationships have to do with making one another feel secure in affection and commitment. Creating a foundation of trust and security will see you through inevitable challenges in the future. It requires considerable effort, time and energy from both of you. Two particular kinds of efforts are crucial: Positive Reinforcement Emotional Support […]

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Boundaries vs. Ultimatums

July 29, 2015
Boundaries vs. Ultimatums

In a recent discussion about the biggest dating mistakes women make, some readers expressed confusion about the difference between setting boundaries and issuing ultimatums. Although the two strategies have similar goals in that they both seek to set limits, they’re opposite sides of the same coin, and they generally produce opposite results. The key difference is […]

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