As I wrote in Learning to Speak Hookup: A Pocket Phrasebook, the vocabulary surrounding the navigation of sex and relationships has become nearly incomprehensible. In the Hookup language, there are many irregularities and exceptions to the rule. It’s also heavily dependent on context. With so much misunderstanding, young people spend a great deal of time [...]
Tags: booty call, booty calls, boyfriend, cheating, date, dating, drama, emotions, friendship, girlfriend, girls, having sex, high maintenance, hook up, hookup, just friends, make out, penis, player, psycho, relationship, relationships, sex, sex and relationships, spooning, text, vibe, video games, women
Dear Susan,
I’m a 21 year-old college student, so I’m completely immersed in the hookup culture. Like many girls I know, I’ve been hurt by a number of jerks and players that I dated. A while back, I decided to stick to nice guys, but it’s very difficult to trust anyone. I can’t stand the idea [...]
Tags: anticipation, bad boys, breakup, college, commitment, communication, confidence, date, dating, drama, feelings, friend, friend zone, friendship, girl, girls, guy, having sex, heartbreak, honest, hookup, hookup culture, intimacy, jerks, love, mature, nice guys, player, players, power, relationship, respect, strategy, text, women
Posted by Susan Walsh on Sep 28, 2009 in
Relationship Strategies,
What Guys Want
Manolith, a men’s lifestyle online magazine, recently ran the article 20 Reasons You’re Still Single. I was delighted to learn that there are apparently a significant number of men who want a relationship and need advice. The piece addresses a wide range of typical male weaknesses, including questionable hygiene, douchebaggery and being “too nice.”
One of [...]
Tags: bad boys, beautiful women, beer goggles, BFF, booty call, boyfriend, boys, challenge, chick flick, Chuck Bass, commitment, control, date, douchebag, drunk, emotional intimacy, eye contact, feelings, girls, guy, guys, hanging out, hard to get, head over heels, hooking up, hookup, hookup culture, hygiene, independent, jealousy, love, male, party, player, power, psycho, pursue, rejection, relationship, relationships, sex, sexual tension, smile, spontaneous, text, The Game, weekend, y chromosome
Posted by Susan Walsh on Sep 24, 2009 in
Tidbits
Bringing you a little laughter link love this afternoon:
1. The Los Angeles Times features a couple of interesting iphone apps to help you date and mate.
The Girlfriend Keeper generates text messages to send to your SO, allowing you to specify the relationship level: strangers, casual dating, heating up, serious or married.
I would consider this app [...]
Tags: bed, blog, british wit, college, condom, date, dating, economist, financial times, freakonomics blog, gender stereotypes, girl, girlfriend, guy, guys, health, hooking up, humor, iphone, iphone apps, kiss, kissing, los angeles times, love, new york times, opportunity cost, relationship, relationships, romantic, sex, smart, swine flu, technology, text, text message, text messages, tim harford, wit, women
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So from my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
Jimmy Soul, 1970
Do beautiful women have a harder time finding real love? I bet Jennifer Aniston thinks so. The woman in this photo writes the [...]
Tags: bar, beautiful women, blog, boyfriend, challenge, confidence, date, dating, douche, douchebag, drunk, eye contact, feelings, Frat, friendship, girl, girlfriend, girls, guy, Guyland, heterosexual, high school, hook up, hooking up, hookup, hot, ideal, love, male, masculinity, Michael Kimmel, New York, nice guys, NY, player, porn, power, rejection, relationship, relationships, sex, short film, single, singles, smart, smile, status, success, talk, text
Posted by Susan Walsh on Sep 9, 2009 in
Tidbits,
What Guys Want
Guys are knuckleheads. I say that with the greatest possible affection. There are some ways in which no guy ever grows up, and while that can be maddening, sometimes it is just so damned charming! Glimpsing the 10 year-old boy that a man once was feels like a sneak peek into his vulnerability. And signs [...]
Tags: random, text, video, wit, women
Amy Johnson is a psychologist and life coach who answers questions about relationships. In a recent post, she identified the three most common themes in the letters she receives from people. The commentary is mine.
1. You already know the answer.
People regularly write asking for a fresh analysis of events, even though they already know what’s [...]
Tags: boyfriend, breakup, commitment, date, dating, drama, friend, friendship, hook up, hooking up, love, men, relationship, relationship expert, relationships, signals, talk, text, text message, together, women
“You’re hot then you’re cold
You’re yes then you’re no
You’re in and you’re out
You’re up and you’re down
Someone call the doctor
Got a case of love bipolar
Stuck on a rollercoaster
Can’t get off this ride”
Katy Perry, Hot N Cold
I want to write about integrity, but I don’t know what it is. Sure, I have a sense of what [...]
Tags: beer emotions, drama, drunk, emotions, ex, honest, honesty, integrity, jealousy, Katy Perry, love, making drama, men, mixed message, open, relationship, relationships, respect, sex, sober, strategies, stuff, TA, text, trust, wit
Posted by Susan Walsh on Aug 10, 2009 in
Hooking Up Realities,
What Guys Want
Yeah, I know this sounds like a tawdry Cosmo article with stupid sex tips, but I figured it would grab your attention. I found it straightforward and informative, always a plus when it comes to sex talk. Sandra Prior is a Brit – I don’t know what it is about the UK these days, but [...]
Tags: anal sex, balls, blow job, guy, guys, having sex, hot, love, masturbation, oral sex, orgasm, penis, sex, text, text message, touch, women
Posted by Susan Walsh on Aug 3, 2009 in
Relationship Strategies,
What Guys Want
“Joey: You waited too long and now you’re in ‘The Friend Zone’.
Ross: No, I’m not in the Zone.
Joey: Come on, Ross; you’re mayor of the Zone!”
Friends
I’m one of those cynics who thinks it is really, really difficult for guys and girls to maintain platonic friendships. I think it works best when:
One or [...]
Tags: advice, awkward, best buds, boyfriend, communication, crush, douche, douchebag, ego, emo, ex, eye contact, fall, fantasy, feelings, friend, friend zone, friendship, girl, girls, guy, guys, hand, hanging out, having sex, honest, hook up, hos, IM, joey, kiss, kisses, loser, male, men, online, open, penis, plan, platonic friends, platonic friendships, random, relationship, relationships, romantic, ross, sex, sexual history, sexual tension, signs, TA, talk, text, touch, unrealistic expectations, wit, women