Did You Feel the “Spark” When You First Met Your Partner?

June 27, 2018

People talk a lot about the “spark.” What is the “spark,” to be exact? Do you need to feel the spark for something to take off? Does it constantly change, morphing into a slightly different feeling of chemistry with each new partner? Or will you only ever feel it once? Will you never feel it at all, just a figment of pop culture’s imagination?

I had a lot of questions about exactly what people felt when they originally met their partners — whether that was a full-blown fireworks show of feeling, or pretty much nothing. I asked 12 women in thriving relationships to travel back in time and tell me their stories about the “spark” (or lack thereof). You can find that post live on Man Repeller now.

In addition, I was interviewed by Melissa Guller for her new podcast Figuring It Out. The show is dedicated to navigating millennial life in the twenties and thirties, with a new theme each week. We talked about The Love Gap, general theories on dating, and lots of advice for building better relationships when everything is so in flux. Our chat was so much fun, I wanted to share. The episode is below.


But let’s discuss! Did you feel a “spark” when you met your current partner? What do you think about  the “spark” in general?